In Part II, I suggested that you avoid bad-mouthing your “ex”. It ruins the holiday spirit and can come back to bite you when the kids learn to bad mouth you. Christmas is the season of goodwill and peace. Why not use it as an opportunity to actually improve your relationship with your “ex”, even if it is only for the sake of your children? You might find yourself less bitter and angry and better able to focus on your future.

Here’s… More

In Part I, I recommended that you contact your “ex” before the holiday rush to confirm that he/she was  going to live up to the parenting schedule you had worked out before. 

 Here in Part II, I want to remind you that it’s you and your spouse who divorced and not your kids. They didn’t file for divorce, you did. If you or your ex is bad mouthing the other in front of the kids, remember they will learn to bad… More

This is the first in a series of short blogs to help you avoid a parenting problem in the next few weeks – the dreaded “Holidays”.

It’s a shame so much stress and tension surrounds Thanksgiving and Christmas. Too many movies are made about the sometimes ugly get-togethers with relatives who don’t get along the rest of the year and don’t want to see each other now, but feel obliged to. Added to this is the problem of divorced couples with… More

Nineteen percent of all marriages in 2008 were a  second go-round for at least one party. If there were problems that led to a divorce in the first marriage, how sure are you that you won’t repeat them again in the second?

The Wall Street Journal, September 20, 2011, page D1, has an excellent article on the questions you should ask yourself before you dive into the pool again.

1. Why? Is it for financial security, a parent for your… More

On September 6, 2011 the Journal published an article on children and divorce in its Personal Journal section (D1)

The article contained some standard advice on how to establish parenting plans for post divorce life that put the “best interests of the children” first. The suggestions were based on the idea that the parents divorced, not the children and that even couples who hated each other could develop workable plans.

Oi vay! You should read the comments sent to the paper… More

 The latest episode of “Entourage” on HBO (Sunday August 14, 2011) reminded me of a blog I wrote on January 17th, entitled “Pointing Fingers”. In the Entourage episode, Ari Gold, the talent agent, arrives late for his marriage counseling session with his wife. She explodes in anger and refuses to even listen to his legitimate excuse (Ari’s client, movie star Vince Chase, has been at the scene of a drug related suicide)  The wife stomps out of the session; Ari gets revenge and humiliates his… More

There appears to be an agreement in Washington on the Debt Ceiling. It was a long ugly and embarrasing fight that might have been handled differently and without taking the country to the economic edge if the parties had paid more serious attention to the Tea Party representatives when they came into Congress in January. They told their own leaders that they would not approve a debt ceiling increase and they meant it. So the country had to wait until… More

There is an important article in the July 9, 2011 issue of the Wall Street Journal: “The Divorce Generation”

http://online.wsj.com/article/SB10001424052702303544604576430341393583056.html?KEYWORDS=the+divorce+generation 

  The article reveals the problems of the  adult children of divorced parents and their fear that they will follow in same miserable footsteps. Divorce is far more devastating on these people than we thought. They lived through the trauma of fights over custody, parenting time,  and unpaid child support. Being shuttled back and forth every few days or worse, rarely seeing the… More

Give your kids a happy Father’s Day…

I have a new article in the June 2011 issue of Womens LifeStyle Magazine of Greater Kalamazoo, http://www.womenslifestylekazoo.com on the dangers of badmouthing your ex to the kids.  See page 19.

Too often one parent will act out his or her anger against the other parent by telling the kids repeatedly what an evil person their ex is.  Eventually the children begin to think it’s actually their idea that the parent is bad.… More

On a recent Sunday, My wife and I were seated near the back of our local church. Since it was Spring break, the church wasn’t crowded. Across the aisle were two young couples, each with one child, a boy and a girl, and both about two years old.

As the service wore on, the little girl started roaming near the floor to ceiling window at the side of the church, examining the glass, the floor, and the backs of the… More