A recent study showed that couples who began their lives together by co-habiting before marriage had a higher rate of divorce than those who waited until the knot was tied. (The Downside of Cohabiting Before Marriage-nytimes.com)
Considering that 50% of all marriages already end in divorce, it seems counter-intuitive that having a “test-run” would cause even more break-ups.
Most “20-somethings” think it makes sense to live together before taking the plunge. But the evidence is different. It seems… More

We have “no-fault divorce” here in the States, but in the U.K. a party suuing for divorce still has to prove cause. Officially the grounds are such serious matters as adultery and abandonment, but it seems the courts will take just about anything presented.

Check out the Saturday April 7, 2012 issue of the new York Times “Tuna Again? In Fault-Finding England, It’s a Cause for Divorce”.

Some of the incredible reasons given are:

He made her dress in a… More

Which is more destructive of a marriage, a face to face argument or with a beginning, a  middle and an end, or routine everyday nagging?

A good fight can clear the air on an issue and might lead to some post fight “make up” sessions, but low grade nagging tends to lead to unspoken resentment and long term development of a cold relationship.

Sometimes, it might be better if the person who feels his/her partner is in non-stop nagging mode… More

In Part II, I suggested that you avoid bad-mouthing your “ex”. It ruins the holiday spirit and can come back to bite you when the kids learn to bad mouth you. Christmas is the season of goodwill and peace. Why not use it as an opportunity to actually improve your relationship with your “ex”, even if it is only for the sake of your children? You might find yourself less bitter and angry and better able to focus on your future.

Here’s… More

In Part I, I recommended that you contact your “ex” before the holiday rush to confirm that he/she was  going to live up to the parenting schedule you had worked out before. 

 Here in Part II, I want to remind you that it’s you and your spouse who divorced and not your kids. They didn’t file for divorce, you did. If you or your ex is bad mouthing the other in front of the kids, remember they will learn to bad… More

This is the first in a series of short blogs to help you avoid a parenting problem in the next few weeks – the dreaded “Holidays”.

It’s a shame so much stress and tension surrounds Thanksgiving and Christmas. Too many movies are made about the sometimes ugly get-togethers with relatives who don’t get along the rest of the year and don’t want to see each other now, but feel obliged to. Added to this is the problem of divorced couples with… More

There appears to be an agreement in Washington on the Debt Ceiling. It was a long ugly and embarrasing fight that might have been handled differently and without taking the country to the economic edge if the parties had paid more serious attention to the Tea Party representatives when they came into Congress in January. They told their own leaders that they would not approve a debt ceiling increase and they meant it. So the country had to wait until… More

Give your kids a happy Father’s Day…

I have a new article in the June 2011 issue of Womens LifeStyle Magazine of Greater Kalamazoo, http://www.womenslifestylekazoo.com on the dangers of badmouthing your ex to the kids.  See page 19.

Too often one parent will act out his or her anger against the other parent by telling the kids repeatedly what an evil person their ex is.  Eventually the children begin to think it’s actually their idea that the parent is bad.… More